$ whoami
> raj. full-stack dev. part-time menace. full-time "one more feature".
$ cat /proc/raj/stats
rizz with recruiters ████████░░ 80%
aura ██████████ 100% (no cap)
chai consumed ██████████ overflow error
sleep schedule █░░░░░░░░░ 10% (it's cooked)
touching grass ░░░░░░░░░░ 0% (side quest, pending)+ added AI to literally everything (it's not a phase, mom)
+ added dark mode to my entire personality
+ buffed debugging speed by +40% when someone is watching
- removed sleep
- removed fear of deploying on fridays
- nerfed patience for "can we hop on a quick call?"
! known issue: says "5 min fix", takes 5 hours
! known issue: will rewrite your whole codebase "just to clean it up"| 🟢 green flags | 🚩 red flags |
|---|---|
| writes tests (sometimes) 🧪 | console.log("here") x47 |
| dark mode everything 🌚 | 37 tabs open, all "important" |
| ships fast, fixes faster ⚡ | names variables thing2_final_v3 |
| answers PR reviews ✅ | "works on my machine" 🤷 |
- make the code work
- make the code fast
- understand why it works
- fix the sleep schedule (skill issue)
- touch grass 🌱
🐍 my commits getting absolutely devoured
if you scrolled this far you're legally my homie now 🤝