Release guide fixes, gh commands and tag-only release CI

[jhale]

Easiest to just read the RELEASE.md.

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Stacked on #4658. I checked RELEASE.md against the current repositories and the v0.11.0 release, and ran its merge recipe on each release branch.

• Merge recipe: git checkout --theirs . resets only conflicted paths. Release-only changes that merge cleanly survive: in a dry run FFCx kept UFCX_VERSION_IS_RELEASE true and DOLFINx kept fenicsx-refs.env pinned to v0.11.0. It also leaves the index unmerged and doesn't remove files deleted on main. git read-tree -u --reset origin/main after merge --no-commit gives main's tree exactly and keeps MERGE_HEAD.

• fenicsx-refs.env: point it at dependency tags before tagging. v0.11.0 did this but the guide never said to. It now matters for Basix, whose wheel tests install UFL from ufl_ref since Require fenics-ufl>=2026.3.0.dev0 instead of a git URL basix#1102.

• Release notes: add a step to finalise release_notes.md, and a new draft section in the main bump. Fix the v0.11.0 full diff link, which still compared against main.

• PyPI: wait a few days after tagging, then build without publishing, publish to Test PyPI with an install check, and only then publish to PyPI, each with gh workflow run commands. Publish UFL, Basix, FFCx in that order so the dependency ranges resolve.

• Post-release bump: spell out the dev-version form, and say not to cherry-pick fenicsx-refs.env back to main.

• Release CI triggers: drop release from the push triggers of ccpp, ci, ci-spack, macos, windows and sonarcloud. Each push during a release ran all six against other components' half-updated release branches, and pushes don't cancel superseded runs. Basix and FFCx already run only on v* tags and workflow_dispatch. Tag runs stay, since they publish docs and test the exact released set. ci.yml and ci-spack.yml now run on v* tags. The ci-spack.yml tag filter sat under pull_request, so it never fired.

• Integration tests: replace the workflow links (three were 404s) with gh workflow run/gh run list commands, dispatched once every release branch is updated. Dispatching UFL needs Run the FEniCSx integration tests on tags and manual dispatch ufl#540, which also drops its release push trigger.

• Docker: gh workflow run commands with every input for the dev/test-env, end-user and update-stable workflows, each run from the DOLFINx tag.

• Spack: FEniCS/fenics-spack and FEniCS/spack-packages no longer exist. The steps now keep FEniCS/spack-fenics in sync with upstream develop and send upstream PRs from a personal fork.

• Fixes: CITATION.md → CITATION.cff, find_package(UFCx) → UFCxPython, "minor" → "patch" for bug-fix releases, and an outdated fenics-ufl example.

• Consistency pass: one set of example versions (0.12.0, UFL 2026.3.0) throughout. Sections follow the overview order: GitHub releases and PyPI now come after the main bump, and downstream packaging and mistakes come last. The merge recipe and the run-and-wait step are each stated once. Each component's diff is checked before it is pushed. Tags are pushed by name. GitHub releases get gh release create commands with an explicit --notes-start-tag. GitHub's automatic choice picked v0.1.0 for DOLFINx and v0.10.0 for Basix, because release tags aren't ancestors of main.

• Missing steps: patch releases now cherry-pick onto release without merging main. The release notes, CITATION.cff and issue template are updated on main first by PR, so they aren't lost after the release. Check the DOLFINx tag CI before producing artifacts. Bump main via PRs. .post0 releases are defined. A new Announcements step covers the website, Slack and LinkedIn.

• ABI checks: a step towards versioning ufcx apart from FFCx, since ufcx.h changes more slowly. Before choosing version numbers, the releaser compares main with the previous tag: abidiff for ufcx.h, libbasix and libdolfinx, griffe for the Python APIs, and Basix element hashes and tabulated values. ufcx gets a new minor version only if its ABI changed, and main no longer bumps it after a release. Each component gets a new minor version only if the checks find an incompatible change, otherwise a patch release (e.g. Basix 0.11.1 alongside DOLFINx 0.12.0), and patch releases must change none of these. I tested the steps locally: the ufcx.h check finds no change from v0.11.0 to main but catches v0.9.0 → v0.10.0, griffe reports real API changes between UFL and DOLFINx tags, and Basix 0.9.0 → 0.10.0 changed pyramid Lagrange values without changing hash(). Depends on Read the UFCx version from ufcx.h in FindUFCxPython #4663, so that FindUFCxPython reads the ufcx version from ufcx.h.

RELEASE.md isn't mdformatted upstream, and formatting it would renumber every list, so I left that alone.

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